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Sep 16, 20182 min read
Pizza Cartels Target Edinburgh Students
Pizza Cartels Target Edinburgh Students Students at the University of Edinburgh have fallen victim to a startling upsurge in street-level...
Aug 19, 20182 min read
An Open Letter to Salad
An Open Letter to Salad Dear Salad, Why do you feel the need to permeate every restaurant meal? Why do you wait beside my steaks when you...
Jul 4, 20182 min read
Pigs Fly Over Russia
Pigs Fly Over Russia Pigs are flying over Russia as part of an unprecedented surge of impossibilities occurring this week. Satellite...
Jun 11, 20182 min read
Essays from the Crypt: England Football Team Biggest Disappointment Since my Son
('Essays From the Crypt' is an anthology of articles which, for one reason or another, never made it to print. Saved from the grave, they...
May 15, 20182 min read
Consensus Needed for Zombie Outbreak, Warn Scientists
Consensus Needed for Zombie Outbreak, Warn Scientists With the saturation of zombies in popular culture in recent years, some scientists...
May 1, 20182 min read
British Pessimism in Jeopardy due to Decent Spring
(Originally written when I hadn't given up on ever seeing the sun again). British Pessimism in Jeopardy due to Decent Spring In a...
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